For once my problem with Michelle’s activities have nothing to do with wasting tax payer money or the fact that she thinks she needs to tell me how to eat. Though, notably, hosting a fashion workshop at the White House at this precise time is tone deaf in the extreme.
This problem is simply that Michelle Obama is not the fashion plate she thinks she is. Despite sharing similar names in the media, Michelle O. is not Jackie O. and she needs to stop thinking she is. This woman has no business hosting a “fashion workshop” and the fact that she wore this outfit to a fashion workshop, should be enough of a reason to understand why.
Let me explain why, just in case you are wondering.
First this dress is not appropriate for a 50 year old woman for several reasons. The fabric is not flattering on her figure, though the cut of the bottom half isn’t all that bad.
However the real problem is the shoulders. Her shoulders and the lack of shoulders on the dress. I have a friend who repeatedly comments on how sleeveless or small strapped dresses are not appropriate for the First Lady. I’m not sure I necessarily agree completely, but they certainly aren’t a good look for Michelle, both because of her age (the sleeveless thing is more a young woman’s style) and because she has shoulders built like a line backer and while I’m sure she’s proud of them, emphasizing them is just not attractive.
It’s not her most flattering body part.
For the most part, her taste in clothing runs the gamut from absolutely atrocious to simply bad colors and cuts. She’s had a couple of successes, but these are certainly the exception and not the rule.
Let’s take a selection of 10 outfits (some of these are the same outfits that I and two of our other writers talked about in a youtube video a few months ago) that are absolutely atrocious.
Trust me, I am barely scratching the service here.
1. It’s The Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown!
In the spirit of Halloween we’ll start here…also we’ll beg Michelle Obama to stop here. Please please stop.
2. Leggings, checkered belts that don’t match your outfit, and multilayered ruffled shirts that look like something out of your teenage daughters bedroom. Michelle, you are the First Lady, not a preteen on her way to a Miley Cyrus concert.
3. Michelle Obama thought that dressing like a space alien was the right choice for a kids award show. Let me assure you Michelle, it was not.
No really, WHAT?
Who thought this was a good idea?
Even her facial expression appears to know this was a bad idea, too bad no one let her know she looked like a couch from the 1980s when she walked out of her closet.
5. This is so horrific that I just don’t have words.
6. Michelle, stop it. It cannot be cold enough in that room to justify a blouse, a sweater, and a blazer. Let’s not even mention the belt that has no purpose in this outfit, either as an accessory or as a practical piece.
I’m really not going to start with the blouse, just…why is made to go all the way up to her chin? Why is it buttoned up all the way?
7. Blue, lime green, purple, and then that skirt.
Alright, I get it, some part of your brain said “I can wear this skirt and then all the colors in these tops will totally go together because they are in this skirt!”
I get the thought process, but this is not a good look.
I’m seriously wondering how it is that no one is letting her know how she looks. I mean, is her husband color blind? Her daughters? Someone help!
8. You look like something that Don Quixote should be tilting at. I don’t even know what thought went through your mind when you put this on. You could not possibly have been thinking this looked good.
I don’t know what’s worse, the fact that the shirt is very ill fitting or the huge embellishment.
9. On a soccer mom going to a PTA meeting this look would be fine. Especially if everyone else is wearing similarly disheveled outfits. The outfit isn’t altogether ugly (at least from the back) but when you are in the company of women dressed like that…
Well let’s just say that you look less like the First Lady of the United States of America and more like a frumpy kindergarten teacher who has been sleeping on the floor at nap time, just like her students. I’m pretty sure the White House has a laundry and I’m pretty sure they own an iron.
10. I’m not sure what is more terrifying about this outfit. Is it the colors or the fact that the pants are clearly a few sizes too small for you? Not only are they too short, but…well I’m not going to say it, because even your husband is looking right at the problem.
Now to be fair, she’s not completely hopeless. I have a couple of selections of good outfits she’s worn, but finding them was not easy because they simply aren’t common.
1. This one is a decent dress. It’s fairly age appropriate, the colors all match, and the flowers don’t make her look like an old couch.
2. This dress actually looks very nice on her. I wish we saw more dresses that looked this good at formal functions. This is one of the few times where her shoulders being bare actually worked for an outfit.
3. And this is another lovely evening gown with a full skirt and a flattering waist line.
Michelle, you aren’t bad looking in general. Your problem is that you make some questionable hair and style choices and you really need to find someone that will tell you the truth about an outfit.
I can’t believe that people are letting you leave the family wing of the White House dressed like this. Either you are ignoring their advice or people are too scared to correct you, but you need to stop listening to the media that praise every outfit that you wear…because you don’t look good.
The scary part is honestly that you think you look good! You think you are fashionable, that you are making good sartorial choices, so much so that you host a fashion workshop for students.
Here’s the hard truth, you are the last person who needs to be talking about fashion and I’m writing this article in a sweatshirt and yoga pants, so that’s really saying something.